A Father’s Day Reflection

The first email I read this morning was from a godly, prayerful man at church. He had sent a mass email, asking “What is the best advice your father ever gave you?” My first response was to think he might feel bad if I wrote him back and said my father died when I was 10 weeks old and I never got any advice!

But I reflected a little longer. When my dad died, God met every need that my mother (who became a widow at 25 years old), my sister (who had just turned 3), and I had. We never lacked. God was faithful to us.

And the gift that I had because of this was that I always had a strong sense and understanding of God being my heavenly Father. My mother made sure we understood what the Bible said about widows and the fatherless, how He cares for them. And we experienced that. I never had to try to understand God through the lens of an earthly father. I knew God cared for me and loved me and was faithful and would take care of me. I felt a strong and direct connection to God.

So that’s what I replied to my friend’s email:

For me, the absence of my father (he died in a car wreck going to work when I was 10 weeks old) left me with a strong sense/understanding of God being my heavenly Father, so in a strange way, that was his gift to me. I always felt God’s love and care for me very much. 

And it struck me as I wrote him back. What could have created doubt or anger at God did exactly the opposite. It gave me confidence in His love.

Don’t misunderstand, I’m sure my mom wrestled with questions as she started to raise two little girls without her husband! Confusion, pain, grief. And I recognized once I had children and watched my husband with them that I had missed something and understood perhaps for the first time that my father had loved me like that. Yet God can handle our heartbreak and our sorrow and our questions. We bring those to Him.

Over time, in continuing to seek God, to trust Him, things begin to emerge. Faith continues to grow. We see things we otherwise would not have known and others can’t understand. God gives compensating mercies (as my mother talks about) that we could never have expected in the moment. My mother’s testimony–through the loss of two husbands–has always been the faithfulness of God, how good He has been to her.

That short email exchange today reminded me there is beauty from ashes, glories from devastations. It may take time to see, but we will stand in awe of all God does in the midst of our broken and painful world. Jesus has won the victory, defeating sin and death, conquering the grave, and giving us eternal hope.

On this Father’s Day, I remember and give thanks for my earthly father; for my step-father (who came when I was 14 and went to Jesus 12 years ago); for my father-in-law who faithfully follows and serves Christ; for my uncles (my father’s brother and brother-in-law) who always stood in the gap; for my friends’ fathers who showed me love; for godly men from our church growing up who remembered the widow and reached out to us; for a dear older man my mother worked for who included us in so many things (he told me when I got older and thanked him, “I knew you didn’t have a father”); for my husband who represents all these things to my children; for my mom who acted as a mom and a dad and raised me to understand these truths and pointed me to Jesus; and most of all to God for being my perfect heavenly Father. What gifts, what grace, what mercy, what kindnesses! On a day meant to remember one, I get remember many who have blessed and impacted my life! Thank you, Father. You’ve been so good to me!

What Are You Waiting for?

Waiting is a part of life. We wait in checkout lines and traffic. We wait for doctor’s appointments and test results. We wait for the right job and relationships. We wait for celebrations, for birthdays and graduations. We wait for vacations and breaks. We wait for the changing of seasons, summer to give way to fall, winter to give way to spring. We wait for something difficult to pass, as the world collectively did over the last two years. We wait to be healed, for deliverance, for answered prayers. We wait.

Waiting seems to be required for formation, though, doesn’t it? Think physically how a baby develops over nine months in the womb or a child grows up. Think how a caterpillar develops through its stages into a beautiful butterfly. There’s physical formation during those times of waiting.

What about spiritual formation? As much as I would love to wake up and be fully holy, we know it’s a spiritual process in our lives by the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit (1 Peter 1:2). In the same way God saves us, He forms and changes us by the power of His Spirit. It’s a process—and one day, when Christ returns (another thing for which we eagerly wait, 2 Peter 3:12-13), those in Him will be glorified with Him (Colossians 3:4), and we will be fully formed. What a beautiful conclusion to that waiting for those who trust in Christ!

If so much growth can occur in the waiting, perhaps it’s something to embrace, to accept as a good part of life. That word wait includes with it hope and confident expectation. What if in our times of waiting, we saw it as an opportunity not to wait on the thing for which we wait, but as a time to wait on the LORD?

  • To wait in His presence (Psalm 37:7).
  • To know that He is God (Psalm 46:10).
  • To trust Him with the outcome of that which we desire (Proverbs 3:5-6).
  • To wait for what He is doing and to see His way unfold.
  • To hope in Him and the truth of His Word (Psalm 130:5).
  • To wait with His promises in mind (2 Peter 3:13).
  • To know that He is the Sovereign Lord who rules over all (Psalm 103:19).
  • To trust in His unfailing love and faithfulness (Lamentations 3:22-24).
  • To believe in His goodness in our lives in all things (Lamentations 3:25-26).
  • To wait courageously and fearlessly (Psalm 27:14).
  • To focus on Him, to behold His beauty, to seek His face (Psalm 27:4).
  • To pray and receive God’s peace (Philippians 4:6-7).
  • To ask for a bigger vision of what is happening in this process.
  • To believe God.
  • To wait patiently with hope and confident trust and expectation.

As we wait, we can remember that God is a God of perfect timing. His ways are right. He is fully trustworthy. We aren’t putting our hope in something or someone who can’t be trusted, but in the One who does all things well.

What might then be the outcome of this posture of waiting and hoping?

Those “who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.”

Isaiah 40:31

Our strength will be renewed. Think about it: waiting for God in a way that trusts Him actually will strengthen us, not deplete us. We won’t be worried or stressed. We will be confident and full of hope.

Finally, Scripture seems to indicate God also waits for us! He waits for us to turn to Him, to return to Him, to look to Him:

The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.

2 Peter 3:9

There’s a mutual waiting:

“Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the LORD is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him.

Isaiah 30:18

Whatever we are waiting for today, let’s look at these things as opportunities to enter into the waiting with the Lord, with prayer and hope and conviction, knowing there is purpose in the waiting. And let’s ask ourselves: what might God be forming in me? And what might God be waiting for me to do? Where do I need to turn to Him anew in trust and faith? 

A Picture of Permanence


Footprints in the Sand

Footprints in the sand remind me of life, of the places we walk, of the impact we desire to have during our lives. We walk and create an impression, these footprints in the sand.

And yet the waves come and wash over the prints, and they are gone. What becomes of the work that we do and the lives that we live? Read more

Don’t Forget to Thank Him

Do you ever pray for something, and then when everything works out, move back into life without pausing to remember the prayer request or how God specifically answered it? I have a phrase that runs through my mind often, “Don’t forget to thank Him.”

This blog started as a way to give praise to God for the great things He has done. I’m reminded today of one of God’s provisions, a “stone of remembrance” (Joshua 4) that I had not yet collected here, where I want to praise and thank Him. Read more